Winter

I wasn’t sure. What is happening to people surrounding me? I don’t know. I don’t know is it because I’ve changed? Or had they changed? Or we all had changed. It was interesting. You watch not only one’s emotional rollacoaster, you watch how people sink into self-pity, into self-denial, into convincing oneself of something or anything. I don’t know. The process itself is painful and selfish. I am not sure if I am right anyway that isn’t important. I shall not dwell about it. Because the one who did changed could be me and not anyone of them. Anyway, my thoughts are just projected.. They are my perceptions which I held close. I’m biased. I live in winter. Perhaps that explains all. Haha... "Silly Girl"...

All are not lost

Just when I'm looking at what I've "lost" and thinking that my life is in a total mess, I couldn't figure out and "point-out" to what I have lost and missed out.

Nothing to fussy about, nothing to complain.

I have everything.

Things that I need, things that I dont need.

Positive thoughts, negative thoughts, positive intention, negative intention, both good or bad..

I have them all. All are not lost.

But I kept complaining, I kept letting myself get controlled by those rustling emotions.

They are only bubbles.

Their life span is so short. So clear so transparent yet you can note its existance.

kkb, remember, bubbles BURST. And back to nothing'ness' once all again.

Peace of Mind

Even so... peace of mind?

Quoting sista, All are not real.

锁

可以把自己锁起来吗?
那么容易, 那么轻易
却
那么困难, 那么艰难
想把自己锁起来因为,
想让自己的想法停顿在这一刻,
不继续胡思乱想而再一次迷失方向.
但是,
还是应该勇敢面对.
虽然没有安全感,
却是
最实际, 最安全的方法.
再一次, 我又被自己的'歪理'征服了.
好累.
为何会那么疲累?

Taiwan

Nice place. Nice picture.

I like it.

Sick TIger

I am not a sick cat. I am a sick tiger.. Been feeling not well for so long.. However, I am making sure that I am doing my part in helping myself to get well.. Till that time....

I am getting ready to strike.

Black Thursday.

I am in foul mood today.

Vent my anger today. I am a loser.

:(

Time

I need more time.

I need more money.

Perhaps, I should get better in time management.
Endless work. Never ending.
I just need to do whatever I can.
More attention in my work.
More affection in my work.
Since when life became so "lifeless" and "timeless" and "endless"?
I am such a loser.
Hahaha...

Playtime

I need some play time.

I am bored. Almost to death.

Nothing seems to brighten up my day.

Nothing seems to interest me alittle.

I am looking forward to that "naughty" moments.

A Secret... Secret... Secret...

Sick

Toilet became my second "home" since Saturday evening. Been sick for so long. Since Jan 2008. I must get more rest and more sleep (sleeping early). I need to rest well to get well. I am not a sick cat. I wanna be well and do things I rightfully and should be doing. I will rest well, sleep early, eat proper and GET WELL. Dear all who is not well, please do the same too. Lets get well!

Fallen?

Once so precious,

Once so valuable,

Did the leaf leave because of the persude of the freedom?

Or because of the wind persude?

It is sad to see people leaving..

Yet I know it will be better well off leaving there.

People come and go.

I am sad.

I need to remind myself.

It's for the better.

I saw the valuable side of you.

Although I am not used to that soft side of you,

You will be one of those who make me realised that it's worthwhile staying there.

Oh,

Oh,

Oh.

新春大吉

祝
喜欢我的人
及
不喜欢我的人
及
我喜欢的人

及

我不喜欢的人

鼠年行大运
新春大吉

(",)

Now!

Simple and peaceful!

Happiness is that simple.

Happiness is that peaceful!

I am happy.

Wishing you are too.

(",)

Chinese New Year

Chinese New Year... Around the corner. Another 2 more days. (",) Not much of festive season mood this year however, I am looking forward. Kalsang Rpc will be in Singapore on the 6th. I am happy. This gave me one strong reason to be in centre and perhaps remind me that I still wished to be there. I missed everything about India. The simplicity of life there hold such mermising power and beauty. How I wished to be there at this very monent. I missed my "Happy Tree". I missed those morning and evening strolls. I missed my "aiyooo". I missed my "eggs". I missed my "tomato soup". I missed my friends. And yes I missed you so much, so much so much HHPR!

Another year just like that. I am grateful for alot of things. Alot of things happened close to the heart. And I am glad and happy that things been well and all have been so kind to me. =)

My wish for new year is simple. I wish good health for my parents and all my love ones. Happy Chinese New Year.~

Carry on walking~

Something happened and this insecurity make me step backwards. However, I am happy because it happened and am glad that is will be over soon. This is a good learning experience for me because it happened not within my expectation. Yea.. expectations.. Anyway, I hope and wish that if ever something happened, let me be brave and carry on walking. Life cant be waste by dwelling the past and expecting/predicting the future. It is the present. As it is. Be brave be you. Be brave is me. =) Sometimes when you feel like like is too hectic, remember to SLOW down. I need to slow down.. No worry no hurry! Be happy be at ease. Oh I cant believe I am so positive. I was never the positive fellow. But I welcome this new "beng". Never felt that life itself can be so simple. I am smiling now because I rejoice! May you be well and happy always!
I thought of this beautiful song~ Simple few sentences but meant so much. Beautiful!


No coming, no going,
No after, no before,
I hold you close to me,
I release you to be so free.
Because I am in you,
And you are in me.
Because I am in you,
And you are in me.

Sleep

I wanna sleep like this puppy. =(

Sometimess

Just sometimes,

when things are not as expected,

despair not,

worry not,

because sometimes,

sometimes they are here to guide you walk out the the dark abyss.

Release

Beautiful colours. Beautiful balloons. Each individual balloon seems to be a "dream" being held in return awaiting to be release into the sky? Maybe each of them indicates "attachments". They are never so anxious to be released into the sky. Awaiting freedom. I say, I would grip them tightly with my hand. Appericate the beauty of it, get tired of holding it and accepting the fact I own them, lossen the grip, you release all the "dreams" & "attachments" Beautiful. Remember, all are not real! (",) We are just learning to appericate the beauty of change itself. Wonders of life itself. Hang on there.
Till then, when you lossen your grip, you will learn to appericate another kinda beauty. Beautiful!
Happiness is here and now.
Have not been feeling well recently. On medication for almost a month now. I felt lousy. I get agaited easily. I got trapped in my own emotions. Silly attachments. Silly Beng~ Anyway, I dont need to find "them" simply because I cant find "them" anyway. Am so glad that I manage to find something to "calm" myself down. Am sorry to those I have been rude to. Am sorry for my tolerance gone down to zero. Am thankful for myself for I realised something yet again. The precious "attachment"! Those medicine are making me drowsy and dreaming. I don't know what I am typing. I don't know what I am trying to deliever. I dont know if you understand what I am writing. Haha... Yes.. This is Beng~ All the uncertainly, makes me feel relieved. I am at the present. The "drowsy" present!! Haa haa! Anyway, it's no longer important.

Moving Ahead

I am trapped in this situation right now. I need to make a decision. (But I know I will not decide anytime soon.) I need to move ahead to pass the 1st "door" before I can carry on moving forward. I am not stress. I am not worried. Perhaps, I just want things to remain as it is at the present. Anyway, I need to remind myself that changes is not scary. Changes is not the end of the world. Do not be afraid to cross the borders because you dont know what lies ahead of you. In the picture, it clearly shows a beautiful path. If it is you, would you choose to walk it or would you choose to appericate it silently? I dislike this. I dislike the feeling and the need to make decisions. Maybe, and perhaps, the only similar feeling to relate to the picture would be the colour. Haa.. I felt silly all over again. Yet, I appericate the sillyness I am feeling now. Are you in or are you out? :P

I Miss You~

.I Miss You.

More then words can say.

Today I'm missing you and with a wish for you.

Wishing you are well & happy.

Beautiful

I realised that all things can be beautiful if you.. If you choose to change your perspectives. Choose to be see the beauty of the world. Paint yours with colours of the nature. Life is busy, simple yet beautiful~ Have you made your choice? (",) I always forget the beauty of life itself. Always busy looking for more things to beautify my life. Actual fact, I have all the things. I don't need to search for it. It is like appreciating a sheet of white paper. You are the artist or author of it. And the sheet of white paper is always ready to soak up an artist/author anxious thoughts etc. I've forgetten totally and now I am learning to appreciate a piece of white paper all over again. (: